So James Arthur has fought off double-pronged attacks from a 9-foot tall, perma-tanned, blubbing scouser and a midget bible-basher with weirdly angular hair to become the winner of X Factor 2012. And doesn’t he seem delighted about it? No, he doesn’t. He just continues to shuffle around sulkily like a grumpy teenager who’s been told to tidy his room. Maybe it’s because now that he’s a somebody for the night he’s realised he has to start the hard work of becoming a nobody again.
You see, though they are famous for a while and some of them shift a few singles, most X Factor winners subsequently become spectacularly unsuccessful. Don’t believe us? Let’s take a look at the Ghosts of Winners Past then, shall we?
2004 – Steve Brookstein
Yeah, see? We’ve proven our point already! Brookstein won, released a Phil Collins cover version and then got dropped. He has spent the intervening years complaining about winning, about releasing a Phil Collins cover version and about being dropped.
He now claims to be a jazz singer.
2005 – Shayne Ward
He may have sold over 3 million records since winning but Mr Ward is now appearing in ‘80’s themed musical’ Rock Of Ages instead of being a pop star. He hasn’t troubled the charts for 5 years.
2006 – Leona Lewis
OK, we admit, she did alright. International hits etc, etc. BUT she still lives in Hackney, so can she really considered a success.
2007 – Leon Jackson
We know – who? We can’t remember him either. Apparently he was Scottish. Ring any bells? No? Let’s just move on.
2008 – Alexandra Burke
Success-wise, Alexandra Burke is kind of Leona Lewis-light. She had a few hits and still lingers in the periphery of the media, but really she’s all but had it. The only recent news we could find about her was that she bought a Range Rover. Says it all.
2009 – Joe McElderry
Yeah. Nice lad. That’s about all though, eh? Does musicals, releases Christmas albums, smiles a lot, makes a living. Good luck to him.
2010 – Matt Cardle
First single – No.1, second single – No.6, third single No.185. Say no more.
2011 – Little Mix
A bit early to tell how these munchkins dragged through a branch of Claire’s Accessories will get on. After a year of frantic dieting and photoshopping their debut album has only just come out. It could take anything from 2 to 6 months for them to hit the bargain bins.