Big Brother is just around the corner and already, I can hear the sighs of people who haven't ever seen it moaning about the erosion of the very fabric of our existence. Yaaaa Boo! Waaaaaaa! Whether you like it or not, and regardless of the fact that it seems to be ailing, Big Brother is a rampant TV beast that manages to become an all encompassing pop cultural phenomenon. Like Glastonbury Festival becomes a city for a day, Big Brother becomes a media continent for a month or two. It takes hold of eyeballs and opinion like no other show. Is it a good thing? Who knows. Who really cares. It's a TV show. Granted, it's a TV show that polarises like no other. Amongst the cringing dross, there's some TV gold in there. We all know about The Big Events that happened... so here are some of my favourite moments that slip under the radar.
Related: Our Big Brother section
Nasty Nick Bateman on the Obstacle Course
Nasty Nick. Everyone remembers his showdown with the rest of the Big Brother house and the shamefaced exit. However, his finest moment came along when he completely ballsed up his attack on an assault course. He'd claimed that he was some big shot army guy... as the abject failure on the monkey bars testified, he actually looked like he had no bones in his arms and legs, thrashing around like someone plugged into the mains. Brilliant.
Science
Science. Whaddaguy. Irritable and master of insults. For all his fine moments, THE best thing he ever did was when he delivered The Best TV Insult Ever: "Tweedle Dee, Tweedle Dum... and Tweedle Tw*t!"
Brian Belo: Uncontrollable.
Brian Belo was a monumental housemate in every respect. Babe the talking pig made him go vegetarian. However, it was the fact that his brain and body seemed to be missing vital connectors. He wet the bed, he walked around with an erection and nearly cut his ear off while shaving. At times, I convinced myself that he was the most underdeveloped human in history.
Glyn. Eggs.
Glyn. The kind of boy that made people go "Aaawww... bless 'im!" He was a great bloke to have on TV. The time he cooked an egg, a simple enough task on the surface of things, made for some highly amusing TV. His little song... "I'm cookin' an egg for the very first time Aahh-Ooo"... became a pop cultural icon for about ten minutes. I also saw whole new worlds of drunkenness from the Welsh wonderkid.
The Winners
The winners? Vapid fame-seeking morons all? Think again. Through the winners of BB, we have one huge reason to be proud to be British. While everyone points and sneers at the viewers... saying how thick and retarded they are, look at the people they chose to win the show: A gay man, a transsexual, someone with a disability, a black guy... all in the number of Most Loved People In Britain (for a brief period, admittedly). It shows how inclusive and great we can all be, looking beyond stereotypes to find more... although, ironically, the naysayers of the show who claim moral highground don't offer the same open mindedness.
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