The Apprentice is still going great guns. It’s still got loads of viewers and seemingly, everyone tunes in just to get really agitated for an hour. Of course, heading up the show is Alan Sugar, former Tottenham Hotspur chairman and owner of Amstrad (who gave us the lovely CPC 464, techheads). He’s as prickly as ever, pointing his hand (that resembles a monkey paw back scratcher) and saying “You’re fired!”. With that, it’s funny how many things Alan Sugar reminds of. I mean, every single time I look at him, a thousand images flash across my mind… so seeing as our Rebecca does the reviews, I figured I’d jump aboard and show you the top 5 things that I think of when I see Alan Sugar.

Related: Our section dedicated to The Apprentice

A Boglin

Suralan’s wrinkly little chops and scowling face always remind me of this oft forgotten children’s toy of the ’80s. Kinda rubbery with deep lines and full functioning eye balls… that’d be our Alan.

A Wooly Willy

There’s something unusually metallic about Sir Sugar’s beard. I’ve come up with a theory that he doesn’t shave, but rather, moves iron filings around his face with a small magnetised pen.

A Teasel Hedgehog

A spiky little face sat atop a withered little body. I don’t think I need to say more.

Nookie Bear

Suralan has lost weight over the years leaving him looking like a ventriloquist’s dummy. His big round head waggles around and talks funny… which leads me to think that his two sidekicks on the show may actually be operating him like a Muppet.

Pat Mustard’s Babies

Pat Mustard, from Father Ted, has Very Hairy Babies. Alan Sugar could well be one of them.