For a few weeks now Paddy Maguire has been intrigued by the mysterious woman who visited Fergal’s grave. He’s watched her, he’s smiled at her, he’s been tempted by the returned smile, and finally he’s arranged to meet up with her. Big mistake. Without knowing quite why or how, he’s now tied to a bed in a sparsely-furnished bedroom and if there’s been any hanky-panky he has no memory of it. For one thing, he still has all his clothes on. Small mercy that, because for a man of Paddy’s reputation and temper, things are about to get a whole lot more uncomfortable. Welcome back to the dark side of Shameless.

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For many, Shameless took a turn for the worse in those seasons where the Maguires held sway. Too violent, too dark, and not enough laughs. Those days, which we were starting to believe long gone, came back for a brief visit this week. Because the mystery woman is the mother of one of Paddy’s victims. An eighteen-year-old heroin addict who injected herself to death on the filth Paddy peddles. And now her mother is determined to administer rough justice, along with a few injections of her own. “Getting a taste of your own medicine” was never so apt a description of an act of revenge.

I’m disappointed in Monica. Even first thing in the morning when she’s not quite awake, I would have expected her to have more sense than open the door to a stranger and start spouting off about who lives there and who doesn’t. Still, it’s fiction right? Give ‘em a break. After all, without a smidgen of dramatic licence we wouldn’t have had the week’s main story about the Visit of the Benefits Officer. And would that have been a bad thing? The aftermath could run and run though, as Monica “misinterprets” Frank’s instruction to be nice to the guy, and takes him for a ride. Giving Frank the perfect excuse to dole out large helpings of cold shoulder. It’s enough to turn her back to Norma (notable this week only by her absence).

Micky finally got his wish to play on the footie team. Only we all know it wasn’t the pitch time he was interested it but the after-match showers. He’s spotted eyeing up the bums by Carl and for a moment thinks his secret may finally be out. But Carl’s only too happy to keep shtum in exchange for a lifetime subscription to Micky’s porn stash. But hang on… will that be the right kind of porn?

Carrie the copper left for Norfolk. Bye then. In other copper news, the desperate saga of Tom’s now-unrequited passion for Debbie drags its knuckles into another week, as he tries to emulate the man from the Milk Tray adverts. Sadly for him there’s a world of difference, romantically-speaking, between swimming through shark-infested waters or parachuting off a cliff, and letting yourself into a Chatsworth terrace with your credit card.

Very few highlights for me in this week’s show, which is beginning to feel like a mid-season slump. I think the best bit came when Frank was trying drunkenly to explain to the Benefits Officer that it’s important to be remembered for something. “Take Geldof – shit songs but he got the kiddies fed.” Now that’s classic Shameless. Pity it was the only memorable line in the show.