I’m pretty sure I’m not in the right demographic for this. There again, I’m not entirely sure what that is. Where do you find an audience that will be scared by the sight of Mackenzie Crook with a really bad mullet and a plastic nose, big enough fans of Philip Glenister not to be completely turned off by his attempt at an American accent that wanders from one coast to another (stopping by various mid-west States on its journey), while at the same time wanting to watch Christian Cooke casually discarding his shirt at every available opportunity (not to mention some unavailable ones)? I think the trouble is, Demons, whose basic idea of “Torchwood meets Buffy the Vampire Slayer” could have been so promising, tries too hard to be all things to all audiences, and ends up misfiring on all counts.
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As I said, the premise is a good one. Luke Rutherford, who has so far spent an ordinary life – school, girlfriend, untidy bedroom, etc – apart from losing his father at a very early age, turns out to be the last surviving male heir of the van Helsing line. Yes, that van Helsing. Arch-vampire killer and dispenser of holy water to various demons the world over. It was that what done for ‘im, governor, many years ago in the presence of Luke’s godfather, the “American” Rupert E Galvin, who has now arrived to coach Luke and convince him to step into his father’s shoes as the next mighty smiter of the undead.
To help him, he has a vast arsenal of weapons and knowledge, assembled by the van Helsings over the centuries and looking remarkably like the headquarters of the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, along with a winsome librarian in the shape of Zoe Tapper who although blind knows exactly where everything is kept, what it’s for, and how to use it.
So far, so predictable, but at this point Demons begins to unravel, somehow managing the difficult feat of simultaneously being both formulaic and unbelievable. With no prior training, knowledge of, or experience in handling demons, Luke exhibits no fear, no surprise and no hesitation in dispatching the supposedly powerful Gladiolus Thrip (Crook) and his henchman Redlip (Martin Hancock). That’s after he’s taken a stout pole to the “Noisy Boys” – three lads with dogs’ heads who appear to be Demons’ equivalent to the Weevils from Torchwood.
I suppose we’re meant to believe Luke, being a van Helsing, has been born to this life and has a kind of racial memory with which to instantly become the smiter he was always meant to be. It didn’t work for me. And neither did the dialogue. Having Philip Glenister essentially apply a mid-Atlantic veneer to his Gene Hunt character and deliver lines like “stand still while I smite thee, freak,” had me laughing out loud rather than cheering his chutzpah or cringing in terror.
OK, this is pre-watershed stuff so we expect the writers and director to have to rein in the horror, but at the very least Demons needs to decide whether it’s a drama or a comedy. We know that undead characters can be funny – you only have to watch the fabulous Being Human to see that – but they can’t be funny AND scary at the same time. Worst of all is a drama that doesn’t take itself seriously. Demons has been called “the British Buffy” but while the actors so patently don’t believe what they’re doing, or the words they are speaking, and instead are camping it up and playing the whole thing tongue-in-cheek, there’s no way it can stand the comparison.
From the teaser-trailers it seems that rumours of Thrip’s death have been greatly exaggerated. He may have dissolved into shreds but he’ll be back. I thought it all looked a bit easy. But if he’s the scariest thing Demons has to offer then the remaining five episodes will play out effectively as repeats of the first, where all Luke has to do is choose the right weapon and turn up, and Demons can safely be consigned to the bin marked “Bonekickers.”
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Everybody involved in the decision that Glenister would use that accent needs shooting in the kneecaps and elbows. It’s Philip Glenister, FFS; people would be tuning in to just to see him. Gene Hunt fighting demons and vampires, what’s not to love? That ridiculous, appalling accent for starters.
I would be quite shocked if it gets a second series. Instead, I suspect it’s a likely candidate for being shifted to a graveyard slot by episode three in the hope that everyone will forget it existed.
I was really looking forward to this both as a huge Philip Glenister fan, and as a lover of all things fantasy/sci fi/supernatural. I thought it would be a nice ‘gap-filler’ until Dr Who returns, but boy was I wrong! It annoys me that script writers can’t be bothered to do a proper job, and think that we, the audience, will not notice any blatant plagiarism, and glaring errors. But of course we know that there are decent script writers out there (Dr Who, Life on Mars, need I say more?) So why do ITV refuse to employ them?
Anyway I’ve just heard a noise from the hallway and I feel the urge to take my shirt off and go and investigate!
hoody demon dogs akimbo -
In a word – dire. Philip Glenister’s American accented “Smite the freaks” (“SMITE”??!) just reminded me uncomfortably of Abu Graib & Guantanamo Bay. Ouch.
No humour, mostly stock situations and baddies, “Gladys” Thripp was a complete laugh (AND he’ll be back, we’re told – oh joy!). And a silly ending.
The only good thing for gay men and straight girls was all those gratuitous shirtless shots of Christian. And “Ruby” had some decent lines (“YOu SHOT me! With a sodding RAY gun!”).
“They Bite”. No. “They’re Shite”.
Oh you miserable lot! I enjoyed it as did both my kids. Good fun for a Saturaday evening.I will be watching every week.
Just when you thought you had got rid of all the Xmas turkey you find you have to digest something as unpalatable as DEMONS. Yes we know it’s on ITV so we have to lower the bar a little but surely not that far. What were they thinking , nothing original, not funny and the saddest thing is you actually want the main characters to be finished off by the demons, sorry freaks, as they are all such empty moronic drivel spouting freaks themselves, i.e. a typical reflection of what everyday Britain has become, who it was impossible to care about. I wanted to like it but sorry I can’t. It’s worse than Buffy the vampire slayer. Bring back the Hammy House of Horror.At least that was fun in all its hoary, old fashioned over the top glory.
Smite Me!! could this be more of a disappointment, from the truly awful “American” accent to the hammy acting, at least with Hammer tongue was firmly in cheek and the actors knew it! . Only cheek here is from who ever decided that this was a good idea.
I was looking forward to this but somewhere along the line the producer seemed to be unable to decide what audience this was aimed for decided on “middle of the road” and lost any credibility.
This could have been good obviously some money been spent but they quite literaly lost the plot
I’m smiting this from my what to watch list, do yourselves a favour do the same. Watching the trailer for next week seemd more of the same
For a program that actually does this kind of genre right, everyone should tune in and watch Supernatural. It’s a very underrated show in America and does not get the credit it deserves.
It is usually shown at stupid o clock on ITV2 on a Sunday, so I’ll be surprised if people actually know about it. However, make it part of your weekly viewing and I guarantee you will love it. It provides everything this show is failing to do!!
Scary, sexy and on occasions very funny.
Season 4 will be starting on ITV2 very soon I hope!
Just watched the second episode. What a dismal pointless waste of time.
Just to draw out the Buffy comparison (and this is clearly the most transparent and inane attempt to rip it off), Buffy was witty, quirky and stylish. Qualities totally absent from this lacklustre series.
So far this has totally lacked any redeeming feature. the dialogue is painful, the plot lacks adventure, intrigue, suspense or humour.
I’m interested to not that this is produced by the company, Shine, that churned out the woefully bad Merlin (which has almost exactly the same faults and whose lead character they seem to have cloned for this series). The script editor, Polly Buckle, was responsible not only for the tedious Merlin but also for the soporific Hex.
In a way this makes sense – I had assumed that the ‘creative talents’ behind this must be either young, talentless gay men with a thing for teenage pretty boy heroes or aged hacks who measure the success of their output by the yard. Instead it’s just overseen by someone who stays in genre they have no feel for.
I’d be interested who’s responsible for the total lack of female eyecandy too. Just who is this supposed to appeal to? who is it who is going to tune into a horror series to see a twink?
Summing up: pedestrian at best.
Ian – thanks for confirming my suspicions. You have a stronger stomach than I: there was no way I was going to watch more than one episode.
Oh and T – totally with you on Supernatural. I loved the first series. Only stopped watching cos it’s too scary for my missus. And the stupid schedule time didn’t help. Brilliant though.
To be honest, I don’t know whether this was supposed to be funny or scary. At least Bonekickers is hilariously cheesy, or is it missing “female eye-candy”? Another inexcusably holey program from shine (not that holes are bad – Doctor
who is a prime example of this) and Primeval shows that ITV can make bearable dramas. Why don’t they just hire the people that make the comments here?
I think that it is very good and you are all jelouse becaus eyou hoped it wouldn’t be as good, i admite some bits are a bit cheesy but other wise you are being perfetic its really good for all the family to watch and very good to see yourself.!
At first I just thought it was campy and funny. Sure, I hated the fact that the actors seem to think they are too good to be doing a supernatural drama, but I have seen it before.
After a while I started to feel a bit ill about the way it presented killing something just because it wasn’t human. Its ikky. We kill them, because they kill us because we kill them? Isn’t that what they did in Bosnia? I just started cringing watching them smite helpless little creatures. Not at first, no. But after a while it just made me feel lousy about being human. I hate the acting, and I feel so sorry for the half lives. Please kill this show. Please.