I don't know about you but when I entered into this Grand Final - customary bottle of red and plate of pasta at the ready beside me - the thing I wondered about was how they were going to explain last week's voting cock-up. Which was a shame, because there were three terrific dancers ready to do battle. Bruce and Tess launched into an explanation, one which left me a bit flummoxed. Fair play to them, and I thought it was an honest mistake (albeit an honest mistake that should never have happened on a primetime talent show), but I just wanted the dancing to start. I didn't care what had happened last week, all I cared about was that it was Grand Final time and I wanted things to start. Thankfully it did, and what a night of dancing.
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Like most finals, there were lots of filler - the couples' Strictly journey, interviews with the judges, interviews with past finalists, all the series contestants making a re-appearance (yes, that meant Gary 'I can't smile properly' Rhodes) - but I want to concentrate on the dancing. For each couple there were a potential four dances to get through (two in the opening show, and they got through to the results show, a further two).
Rachel and Vincent
Off we went with this perfect-looking couple. They did the foxtrot and if you remember the last time this pair did that dance they scored perfect tens all round. Again, they performed a really beautiful routine - full of romance, excellent footwork and beautiful poise. It really was an excellent start to the show, and the judges agreed. Craig even went as far to say that Rachel had been the most consistent dancer the series had ever seen. Perfect tens again.
Their second dance, their highest scoring Latin dance, was the rumba. Going for full-on romance, I thought it was good but it didn't blow me away. They didn't use the floor that much, and stayed pretty much in the middle and used more upper body moves more than any serious legwork. Very nice though, and the routine bordered on the smoldering. Less was definitely more in this one. The judges loved it too - Arlene said it was a love story told through the rumba, and showed something she never thought Rachel had; raw emotion. Len said that a slow dance is not the perfect dance for a final, because it needs so much control and poise, and there was greater potential for nerves to take over. Rachel, he said, nailed it perfectly. Craig said it was indecently delicious. Craig: 9; Arlene: 10; Len: 10; Bruno: 10.
Tom and Camilla
Tom and Camilla were really up for it, you could tell. We heard how much it meant to Camilla to be in the final after two semi-final exits, and they came out and danced very well. Their foxtrot had a real Hollywood feel to it, and Tom led the dance commendably. Through the weeks I've not been convinced with Tom, and he slipped up (literally) in this routine but recovered well. What I do think he does well is dance naturally, and Len pointed this out. He also pointed out, which I hadn't really thought of before, that a male celebrity is always at a disadvantage because he has to lead, and that's always difficult. Still, Arlene, in a bit of flourish, provided a superlative that incorporated James Bond, Daniel Craig, Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire and, erm, Jeremy Clarkson all in the same sentence. Interesting. Craig: 8; Arlene: 9; Len: 9; Bruno: 9. 35. Tom said he just wanted to get through to the final results show so he could perform his show dance. How good could his show dance be, I wondered.
Their second dance, the salsa, was pretty hot and full of energy. Tom has hips of anguine marvellousity, that has never been in question, and he really looked as though he enjoyed himself. He and Camilla's arms were going like the clappers all through the routine, and they certainly got the crowd in their feet. Len said he was knocked out, Craig said his facial expressions were less smug (Tom's, not his own). Craig: 9; Arlene: 10; Len: 10; Bruno: 9. 38.
Lisa and Brendan
This pair have really been looking the business in the past few weeks and, along with Rachel, she is now the best dancer. No question. It was back to the foxtrot for these two, and my goodness they performed it well. It was really beautiful and seriously rivaled Rachel and Vincent's opening effort. The judges were mad for it. Craig said it was the perfect example of hard work, dedication and it was better than the almost perfect their last foxtrot merited. Arlene, again brilliantly batty in her surmising, said that Brendan held a woman like no other. Tens all round.
Next up for them was their highest-rating Latin, which was the cha cha cha. I really enjoyed the routine and Lisa's pins were on full show. This put a magnifying glass over her footwork, and I'm pleased to say she really delivered. She was crisp, light and very good. Bruno said it was eye popping (and almost knocked Len out with one of arm-raising flourishes), and Len and Arlene were banging on about the fact that her previously bent legs were straight and proud. Craig: 10; Arlene: 10; Len: 10; Bruno: 10. 40. Brendan was in tears.
The result show:
We were straight into it. No messing. Lisa and Brendan were out. That was a shame because, even though there's something about her I'm not quite sure about, they had danced amazingly well and I thought they were peaking just at the right moment. I've also been really liking Brendan this series - he seemed to have ditched (some of) the ego and concentrated on getting the best out of his partner. Fair play to him, and thanks for some great dancing you two.
The atmosphere was really electric in the studio, and it was left to the remaining two to battle it out.
They kicked off with a double Viennese waltz, for some hot direct, dancing-at-the-same-time comparison action. I always find this bit quite difficult to watch, let alone judge, because they're both going at it and the camera doesn't quite know who to focus on. Still, I thought Rachel and Vincent shaded it.
After some dancing from the professionals, Lisa and Brendan's show dance, the return of Austin, Christine and John (complete with his sack-of-spuds dragging routine), Bruce having a go at a floor manager who was trying to get him to hurry up, Duffy singing Mercy, Bruce singing (badly) (a moment during this routine I pondered: Anton made an appearance during the routine, and tried steal the mic from Bruce. A metaphor for what might happen in Strictly presenting duties in the future?), and four past finalists going for it in a routine (how good is Jill Halfpenny?! Answer: serious) it was time for the show dances.
Rachel and Vincent came out first and performed their number beautifully, as ever. There was a bit of everything, and it was tasteful, technically brilliant but... but... but... it didn't blow me away. Very, very good, but it just didn't have the wow factor.
Tom and Camilla, on the other hand, had more wow factor than an Ola Jordan catsuit. They came out and did a ragtime number, full of cheek, full of razzle-dazzle, full of comedy and some of the most incredible, death-defying lifts I have ever seen. There was ballroom, there was tango, but all done in a piss-takey, comedy sort of way. It was incredible, amazing and I was totally on my feet. Those Lifts! That choreography! Unbelievable! Crowd on their feet, Craig saying it was a Bisto moment, darling (not a smelly fart as we at school used to hilariously joke, but they saved the best till last), and Arlene saying it wasn't just brilliant for an amateur, it was brilliant for a professional. Len said he liked Rachel's but that was something else.
There was only one winner after that. I have loved Rachel and Vincent throughout the series, and to be honest she's a better technical dancer than Tom, but he won it because of the show dance, pure and simple. I'll leave you to debate whether that was a correct decision, but nice one Tom. You not only pulled it out of the bag at the last, but completely obliterated the bag. You are a bag assassin, my friend.
A great show, two and a half hours of dancing and good old fashioned family entertainment. Great stuff. After a series wracked with controversy, it was the perfect end - dancing, Brian, was the winner.
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