Helen and Stephen got the “sorry, I am closing your restaurant” treatment last night and I was seriously down in the dumps about it. Initially, I felt a hot flush of anger, mentally pointing out that Alasdair and James and make a sackful of incredible errors and… and… it was all very unfair. However, when you think for that extra second, shove your emotional investment to one side, you know that no matter how much you think you know about something, Raymond Blanc knows more.

The rub is this: Helen and Stephen were super organised, warm, successful in their endeavours financially, but not producing food that would do Raymond Blanc justice. In last night’s challenge, faced with making a cookbook, all the couples struggled in their own way. Helen and Stephen, surprisingly for a pair of marketing folk, made something that looked like children’s laminated card recipes… which was only half the point. Sadly, the food look spectacularly uninspiring, which, in Raymond’s case, is a cardinal sin. After all, this is a show about passion in food, non?

On the photography and presentation front, Russell and Michelle, Alasdair and James, did a little better… in as much that the photos on the inside of their book looked great. However…

Russell and Michelle’s book was filled with some seriously great shots of food (the mackerel one in particular made me want to leap through the screen and devour the page) and some food memories of theirs. It was a neat little trick that wasn’t missed by Raymond and Co. However, unavoidable was the car-crash book cover which look, to be frank, revolting. It also didn’t mention food, recipes… anything like that. A glaring omission.

As bad as that was, it had nothing on Alasdair and James, who, I’m beginning to think are actually dyslexic. Their book, again, filled with wonderful shots of grub, had so many spelling mistakes that it actually became quite surreal. Highlighted in the show… “Mayognaise”, “Equpment” and the brilliantly wrong “Scaloops”. Raymond pointed out that he saw a dozen spelling mistakes “and I’m a Frenchman!” It was a real dog’s dinner.

However, Alasdair and James refuse to go away. No matter how many dreadful errors they make, the gang deciding their fate clearly have a soft spot for them. I started out hating every inch of them… but over the weeks, have softened on them, partly because they keep having to go to hospital, partly because in virtually every area outside of the kitchen, they’re useless and partly because I think they’re going to get engaged in the final show. One TV Scoop reader pointed out that, if they’re in the final, they’ll win. It’s not a bad guess because, no matter how many f***-ups they make, they’re still here, which means they’re living a charmed life indeed.

Russell and Michelle are also strong contenders too, reminding me a lot of Jeremy and Jane from last year’s show (the winners no less, should you need reminding). Basically, she cries frequently (which is getting irritating it has to be said) and he’s oddly calm and quiet.

However, Tim and Lindsie (who sweetly came in for the vote-off to show a bit of support) are surely still in the lead? They’re growing in confidence at exactly the right time and seem to handle everything thrown at them. That all said, it’s too close to call. Tim and Lindsie and Russell and Michelle seem to be as strong as each other, while Alasdair and James seem to be in a position where they could murder a customer and still avoid closure…

…I really can’t call this one, and I’m riveted and enthralled as we get ever closer to finding out. For those wondering if anyone has already won… think again. I found out that the show films two separate endings and the winner is informed moments before transmission of the final show! So with that, we’re all – the contestants included – begging to find out who wins! For a wild stab, I’m going for Tim and Lindsie.