Brilliant story, this. It covers my three favourite things: Strictly Come Dancing, cosmetic surgery and women in their 60s. Arlene is considering a gastric band after gaining more than a stone since the last series. Here’s what she said…

“I want to be slim, I want to be gorgeous. I’ve put on a stone and a half since the last series. It’s on my tummy. I want a gastric band, but I don’t like needles or knives, so what’s a woman to do?” she told The Sun. Why, it’s a mystery. Just keep on getting fatter and fatter until they have to roll you onto set, presumably. There is no way you can control it, after all.

Phillips isn’t all about the surgery, though – she’s dismissed the idea of getting Botox and said that today’s preoccupation with youthful looks frightens her. “We’re in a world of plasticity,” she added. Slightly strangely.