Years ago, when 10 years Younger first slimed onto our TVs, the then unknown Nicky Hambleton-Jones, discovered through her style consultancy Tramp to Vamp, became known as a ‘guru of style’. Or, if you prefer, a horrendous skin peeling cackling evil machine. In Nicky’s words, “everyone has a hairdresser and maybe a beautician, but a personal stylist has always been for the rich and famous. My idea was to make personal styling available for everyone.” That may be so, but who reckons that the famous are so comprehensively demoralised during consultation?

Obviously, 10 Years Younger (Channel 4, Thursday, 8pm) is back on our screens, ready to tell you that, it doesn’t matter what you’re like as a person, if you are unfashionable, you are nothing. Wrinkles? You might as well kill yourself right now.

If you’ve got this far, it’s probably because you’re curious as to why you should watch this show. Well, in all honesty, you shouldn’t. You should be watching the fantastic The Restaurant (BBC2, Thursday, 8pm). However, I can’t keep previewing the same shows week after week, so I thought I’d give you the option of some serious bile removal. 10 Years Younger should make those of you with a brain so angry that it could ignite the air around your head.

Thursday sees a continuing of the summer specials in which Nicky Hambleton-Jones and her team of fashion gargoyles attempt to ‘help’ people look a decade younger. Of course, the participants on the show (this week we have DJ and music entrepreneur Simon Dehany) need to be convinced that they look worse than a burns victim. This is done by wheeling them out into a public place and having the nation’s most dim point at them and dribble “Vey look like vey am two hundrid yerr oweld like… well oweld.” This makes the participant cry inside, thus, adding another handful of wrinkles to their already needy brow.

Of course, by the time Hambleton-Jones has finished whispering in their ear like some treacherous Shakespearean character pouring poison in a King’s ear, the participant is almost willing to do anything she says. This essentially means allowing Nicky to point and laugh at all your clothes, allowing a man to peel your skin off with chemicals and the slow yawning decline into fashion drone. They’ll have this DJ looking like one of The Klaxons before the end of the show… and he’ll weep tears of joy… just like someone released from a hostage situation. [Mof Gimmers]