BBC3 know how to get my TV taste-buds going. Get me frothing at a title like Freaky Eaters: Addicted to Cheese (BBC3, Monday, 7.30pm). One of the (not so) subtle shifts in TVland is that this show would have once been called ‘Problem Diet’ or ‘The Food Doctors’, but now, the suits seem at ease shouting in the listings. ‘Help! Cheese Is Making Me Die’ or ‘Huge Fromage Errors’. Freaky Eaters is basically saying ‘Penny peep show this way…’

With that, I tuned in to have a laugh at the expense of someone with a problem. I believe they call it cracking walnuts with a sledge hammer. I was all set to make bad puns about cheese and generally slay the fool who would eat nothing but cheddar. How wrong I was. As ever, I found a heart just in time, and started to feel sorry for the participant.

This series sees a nutritionist called Natalie Savona and psychological coach Benjamin Fry trying to help people with dreadful eating habits. I’ve already seen one of these shows and it featured a girl who ate nothing but chips. This lass wasn’t prepared to change, so I had a good laugh at her and threw vocal artillery at the TV for an hour. It was brilliant. While Savona and Fry meekly looked on I snorted and yelled “TELL HER SHE’LL DIE! LET HER HAVE A HEART ATTACK!!!” Of course, this is why no-one in TV would give me a job on such a show.

Last night saw a nice chap called Dave Nunley who is a panel beater. An adrenaline junkie, Dave liked nothing better than traveling at great speeds on his jet-ski and doting on his two kids. One problem – he’s never eaten a hot meal in his entire life. Seriously. So I started sharpening my sword and thought ‘Ha! I can make a lame gag tomorrow and say things like ‘I’ve had more fights than he’s had hot dinners…” Again, I’m a heartless swine at times.

Then, watching Dave retch as the tiniest bit of chicken passed his lips, I began to see how serious the whole thing was. Y’see, Dave only eats crisps and cheddar cheese. Nothing else. At all. Obviously, I thought this was going to be hilarious, but seeing him breakdown and explain that he feels that he is failing his children by having such an irrational phobia… well… you couldn’t help but feel immensely sorry for the lad.

To add to this, it dawned on me (and then the show confirmed) that this diet of his must make his life an absolute misery when going out for a meal with the family, or if having a barbecue or something. Whilst everyone tucks in and has a good time, you’re left sneaking off eating a plate of grated cheese. No fun at all.

So Fry and Savona pushed and pushed Dave into trying soups and other types of cheese (namely the tasteless clot of Cottage Cheese) and Dave went under. The more they pushed, the more he resisted. It was quite unpleasant to watch. Then, a realisation. ‘Let’s leave Dave to it!’ And behold, Dave realising that he needed to sort his diet out (or he would surely have a huge heart attack after eating more than his own body weight in cheese per year), started to force salads down him. Good lad! By the end, we saw him at a restaurant with his kids tucking into something that has never seen an udder! Shockingly, I was genuinely pleased for him. Will I tune into this show again? Only if there is nothing better on. [Mof Gimmers]