It’s been a while since I watched Brainiac. Last time I saw it, the Hamster was at the helm. A jolly anarchic programme that generally enjoyed blowing things up (especially caravans) and poking its nose into all sorts of vaguely scientific things, for me it was always one of those shows that wasn’t worth making an effort to stay in for, but was always good for a laugh when there was nothing better to do.

If that’s not exactly a glowing reference, stick around. It gets worse. For imagine my surprise when, tuning in from my lonely hotel room (where, as you might guess, there was nothing better to do) I discovered Mr Hammond had been replaced by none other than Vic Reeves.

There was a time when Vic Reeves was one of the two funniest on the box. That time was Vic Reeves’ Big Night Out, and the second funniest man was his partner in crime Bob Mortimer.

But that was then, and this is now, and sadly it seems Vic is on his comedy uppers, relying on a liberal sprinkling of scatological references to raise a smile among the more juvenile of his audience. Admittedly his humour was never exactly high brow, but it was original, well-timed and carefully thought out. Within seconds of the credits rolling on tonight’s show we were treated to a reference to Brainiac being the show that “poohs in a petri dish and leaves you to explain why” followed almost immediately by people “wetting their pants with excitement.”

A few minutes later Vic was dressed up like a mad scientist, complete with ubercliched German accent, examining the effect of liquid nitrogen on a paint ball. Since the ball had a small hole drilled in it, emerging from a short immersion in the nitrogen caused it to spin rapidly. “See?” observed Vic, “It begins to spin like faeces down the toilet.” Just the image I wanted while I was tucking in to my chocolate ice cream.

Toilet humour aside, I found the whole delivery even more wearing than most; Reeves sounding like a hyperactive cross between Heinz Woolf and Alan Whicker, desperate to make the lack-lustre “science” (the search for the best hair gel and a look at the effect of rockets on a garden shed – well surprise, surprise it flies a few metres into the air and falls to the ground in a pile of splinters) sound interesting and succeeding only in making himself sound increasingly desperate.

Not recommended, even for amusement only.